Utterly Distant
BIBLICAL POINTS OF REFERENCE:
"Look to yourselves that you do not lose what we worked for but may receive a full recompense."
~2 John 1:8
"I am coming quickly. Hold fast to what you have, so that no one may take your crown."
~Revelation 3:11
Pretty much every night last week, I was having the hardest time falling asleep, staying asleep, and getting enough sleep in general. I think we all know that sometimes we don't get as much sleep as we want, and maybe for one night it's okay, but if we're still in the same situation a few nights later, we can really start to feel the effect of no sleep in our daily lives. Whenever I can't sleep, I look up to the ceiling and say, "Alright Lord, what are you up to?" Of course He usually doesn't answer me right away, but I know that when I hear what He wants me to hear, or see what He wants me to see, I can typically fall back to sleep easily. But what got me this week is the fact that I couldn't figure out what God wanted me to figure out, and it was costing me my sleep and my sanity. Before I go on here, let me just say that I'm not blaming God for my lack of sleep; on the contrary, if God was prodding me in my sleep about something, it must be either because it's important or because I won't listen any other time, or both. So really, it's my own fault that I'm not more receptive during the day, but I'm working on it. Anyway, this cycle of sleeplessness went on for almost the whole week, and I didn't get the message until I was on a team retreat at Church and was safely seated in Adoration Friday night. I looked at Jesus on the alter and I asked Him to just give me peace; I told Him I was there to hear what He had to say, and that I was listening. Nothing came at first, and soon I was so tired that I started to nod off, and that's when I realized that I was at peace just being close to our Lord. And that's when it hit me: I had been so utterly distant from God over the last few weeks, really since moving back up to school for the semester after Christmas. My relationship with God was quite literally hanging by a thread, and I was embarrassed and ashamed that I had let it slip away so fast. I felt like I had betrayed my best friend, because I had, in a way. I don't believe in coincidences; I believe that everything happens for a divine purpose, one that God is leading and guiding us towards. Sometimes all it takes to understand what that purpose is is by listening to what God has to say. And when it's important, God won't rest in His ways to get us to understand. But we cannot be looking the other way when He calls us; we cannot ignore the signs He presents to us, even if they don't seem like signs at first. Let's be honest, there could have been many reasons I wasn't sleeping, like stress or the temperature of my room, but even if that were the case, being open to asking God is the important point. My sisters, it is so difficult to hear what God is trying to say with the distractions that are passing us by every minute of every day. I can relate, and I can emphasize. But that isn't an excuse. We need to hear what God has in store for us; it is something great! So my challenge for you all this week is to listen to God; don't keep your distance from our Savior, and if He calls at an unexpected time or in an unexpected way, take the leap and ask God what He wants you to know. Be patient, because He will present you with what you need when the time is right. Your Laughing Sister, Callahan Check out the WISDOM quotes page for more inspiration!
